Changing Times

From birth until kindergarten, it seems like the lives of my children changed almost daily. Then things seemed to settle down a bit and we settled into the routine of life. Then they started graduating high school and things start to dramatically change again.

This fall/winter, I have been dealing with some dramatic changes in the lives of my kids and we're not anywhere near done! I'm attempting to the best of my ability to roll with the punches but oftentimes I find myself a bit sad and a bit lonesome for my little kids.

Amy moved back home into a newly constructed room .....for about 2 months. She moved in with a friend which left us with a newly constructed empty room. Her brother was very happy to move into that room and between school and work I hardly see him. He's planning to go away to college next fall. Josh still lives 3 hours away and this month (Feb), he has two grad school auditions....I was hoping for KU (only 35 minutes away) but alas, the auditions are in COLORADO and LOS ANGELES!!!! Emily just started the second half of her somphomore year and having been down this road 3 times now, I know how very, very fast these final years of high school fly by.

So here I am, staring an empty nest in the face. Today I have something in my house I've never had before.....an EMPTY ROOM!!!! Our house has always been full to 0verflowing - until now. The upside is, I have a nice guest room and a permanent place for scrapbooking. The downside is, I will soon have another empty room - The upside is, Cliff will soon have his man cave (sorry, I really do hate that term).

I'm trying to redefine my life to a certain degree. Somedays, frankly, I just don't know what to do with myself. Somedays I'm just very sad. Somedays I'm just very lonesome. And somedays, I really do enjoy this season of life. Its a new one....unchartered territory for this mom.

Josh asked me how I would handle him going out to LA. I told him if thats the door God opens for him I'm glad to see him go through it. One of the hardest things things this mom ever has had to do was let these kids go to spread their wings and live their lives. But that's exactly what they are...their lives. I've had my opportunites and made my mistakes and learned valuable life lessons. Now its their turn to find out who they are and who God wants them to be. So part of me is sad because I miss them terribly and yet I am filled with so much peace that God is looking out for 4 of the best parts of me.