Every year at Christmas I love to bake cookies....lots of them.  Christmas 1994 came too fast and I didn't get the cookies made for Christmas Eve so I baked them for New Years. In late January, 1995, I noticed that I suddenly gained 10 pounds.  I knew I had eaten my fair share of those Christmas cookies but certainly not 10 pounds worth.  Cliff kept saying, You're pregnant, Rebecca."  I thought he was crazy.  I was on my way to set up for my Wednesday night kid's class at church when I decided to swing by the drug store and pick up a pregnancy test and prove him wrong.  Was I ever shocked when I looked at the results on the test.  I called him and said, "You're not going to believe this....

I'm PREGNANT!!!"

 From the beginning, I knew this would be my last pregnancy. We both knew that 4 children would complete our family. I loved being pregnant and I tried to take everything in and cherish everything that comes with expecting a child....the anticipation, the first flutterings of life, and the growing intenst love for a child I hadn't even met yet.

We had 3 chilren in our home - Joshua, Amy, and Jacob. I was afraid to hope for another girl.  The day of the ultrasound arrived and to my absolute delight, we were told I was going to have another daughter.  I chose her first name, Emily.  Her dad chose her middle name, Melissa.

 She arrived September 11th.  She was healthy, beautiful and an extremely laid-back content baby.  Emily has been my constant "side-kick" her entire life.  When we moved here to KS and I began working, she was able to come to work with me.  I set up a shelf for her in my office with little toys and videos.  To this day, some 15 years later, I still have a little basket of toys on that shelf.

Cliff and I knew she would be our last baby and we would calculate how old we would be when out last child would turn 18.  I don't quite know how the day has arrived so fast!  She is ready to fly.  Emily is talented and creative, strong and independant.  She knows what she believes.  She has strong convictions and a strong faith to back up those convictions.  She is responsible and very very sweet and kind. 

Happy 18th Birthday, Emily!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Very Sweet Weekend

 

This weekend we had the opportunity to spend some time with 3 out of our 4 children.  Since Jacob changed schools this fall, he and Josh are now only 45 minutes from each other.  It was so great to spend time with my kids!

 

My mom's heart was so blessed watching and listening to them interact with each other....not as children but as adults.  It was interesting listening to them share with one another their dreams and goals for their futures. 

 

I intend to take advantage of the fact that the boys are so close to one another. Once Emily leaves for Florida next year and Josh heads to grad school, these moments will get fare and few between (pretty much the way it is with my own brother and sister).  I need the time with them but they need the time with each other as well.

 

Yesterday Emily mentioned that she always misses Jacob.  Those two grew up together.  However, she's used to Josh being gone but she doesn't realize how much she misses him until she spends time with him.

 

It was a sweet time!!!!!

 

August Changes - Part 2

Here she is!  My baby girl, Emily on her last first day of school.             

She was ready to start school this year so she can get it done. 

She is so ready to move on!

August Changes - Part 1

This is the third time I've watched this scene play out.  One of my kids loading up all their earthly posessions and heading out to life on their own.  This time its Jacob, and his cousin, Zack, and their friend, Noah. They backed a trailer up to my mom's and filled it up....on a very HOT day! 

Jacob has already done a year of school away from home. However, I don't think saying goodbye gets any easier...in fact, I know it doesn't!

Grandma was very generous to them and gave them all the furniture in her basement.  We also loaded them up with lots of essentials (cereal, snacks, etc)

The trailer was loaded and goodbyes were said and they were off!!

And things are quiet. (too quiet)



It's Been A While!

Somehow life has gotten away from me!  My last post was February 14 and amazingly enough, 6 months have passed!!

I have been absent from blogging for a while because I've needed some new purpose. I think I have found something.  My youngest child will be starting her senior year of high school in just a few weeks.  My first child was born in 1985 and now, 27 years later, after raising 4 children, I am seeing an empty nest on the very near horizon. 

I intend to fully enjoy this final year of "childhood" with Emily.  I hope to create a host of wonderful memories.  But deep inside, my mom's heart is hurting as I watch my youngest prepare to spread her wings and fly.  I've been down this road three times already and frankly I dread it.  It's so bittersweet. 

So, I will hopefully be blogging regularly on my journey to an empty nest. There will be other stuff too but I figure if for no one else, it might just be extremely therapeutic for me.

So, ready or not, here we go!!!!!

Life Stages

 

I figured out something this past week about grandchildren.  No, I don't have any yet but I think I understand a large part of the bond a grandparent has with the grandchild. 

The grandchildren fill the void that is left when your children have grown.

It also seems that the stage of life between when your children grow and leave and the time you have grandchildren can be a very nostagic and sometimes sad place.

 

This is me and my youngest child.  Thank God she is still at home.....for about 18 months more.  But she is at that stage of her life where she is active and has a life of her own.  I treasure our time together and yet I know it is so fast and fleeting!   And I find myself knee- deep in the nostagic and sometimes sad stage.

It's not bad.....it just is what it is.